Category Archives: Knowledge

Dating

SO this video on Ted about hacking into online dating.
😀

Please view it if you hadn’t, its interesting. Having been on dating sites long enough, I could fully comprehend her points and entirely agree to her research.

So the other time, during Valentines day, I posted this:

Mr Spock's Logical Love

 

and to this day, I still agree to it. and what we look for is that (we)deemed worthy guy to partner that on.

Reminds me of this experiment I put myself into the past months.

I abstain. I walked away. I chose.

and obviously the body isn’t coping well. there were bouts of topsy turvy. the insane mood swings that (I thought) chocolates can solve. the need. THE NEED.

Its not loneliness, because loneliness can be solved by interacting with people close to your heart, or hanging out with friends. I have plenty of female colleagues and attention I tell you.

So conclusion. It was members of the male species… I wanted attention from guys.
Ladies and Gentleman, its the libido at play…

We can’t run away from it… its primitive…

I guess the point is, it is not abnormal to crave attention and interaction from the male species.
While I feel that the culture norm treats its as abnormal or being “too-open” to openly seek responds from the male species, I think that stigma.

I say *aloha* to culture norms.

 

 

Thanks for coming by

Be Bless
Love,
Amanda

I.T Guys

I’ve been meeting and interacting with a couple of guys from the IT industry these days. Those of position, not the data entry kind. (not that I’m belittling some, this distinction is necessary for the purpose of the entry). (although surprisingly, I.T Guys does not have a particular body type. They are either normal or overly plus)

frabz-IT-Guy-What-my-friends-think-I-do-What-my-mom-thinks-I-do-What-s-2e65dd

So… one was really random, met on the plane ride, the other was currently the longest Indon-friend I have and another was from online. (and many others that aint exactly at the back of my mind).

I realise one thing, they are all overly stimulated. (So poor thing, not that its a bad thing, cos I am like that).

Because their line of work requires them to analyse perhaps massive data, and I would assume deal with codes and system flows at times.

That rolls into the effect of having the constant need for intellectual stimulation. (I do think they would talk nonsense too, just that I hadn’t had a taste of it yet).

That guy on the plane was super fidgety. We could be chatting and then lapse into a brief period of silence, and then there will be another come back not on the surface of a topic, but of content obviously from after analytics (could be of a new topic or the current topic). Other moments he will be touching the magazine, his passport, the food tray (which I’m guilty at times too) and well, doing other things that I didn’t notice as I probably would be asleep. 😀

and the other guy. He is the master of “Why”. Tracing downwards, getting to the roots. Spilling random facts, (trying) to proof that he is very knowledgeable. Intrigue you with new thoughts, sharing that he is reading this certain book, economics, politics, control, power, current situations. Its just… the whole time. I just laugh at him. The whole time.
😀 okay lar, got giggle and chuckle too.

and of course that longest-known-IT guy friend, I asked for verification, and he agrees, people in the IT line tend to analyse things a lot. 😀

I know right.

and I think if SG guys had it hard, Indon guys had it harder.

I jokingly agree with the longest-known-IT guy friend, that I should hang out with an IT guy. Let him provide the mental stimulation that I crave..

😀

 

 

Thanks for coming by

 

Be Bless
Love,
Amanda

Conversations

Okay,

So i’ve unpurposefully isolated myself. 😀
Just kidding,
I didn’t isolate myself, and neither were things done purposefully nor unpurposefully.

Considering I had enough interaction during the working hours, with the kids mainly, I appreciate the quietness that comes when.. I don’t input and output much.

Then came the tons of Ice Shaken Lemon Tea I’ve been drinking. and of course, the amount of money I’ve thrown into the Starbucks card.

Especially and mainly because, you guess it, the interaction I get from the exchange with the Baristas.

1618398_10152022478557144_1362187954_n

 

I only understood it recently that I would somehow bring myself to the SB nearby (like 3mins walk away) day in and day out to get that tea, not bcos I’m addicted to the tea, but because I look forward to that interaction with the Baristas.

Some days, its “Oh I want that Lemon taste to perk me up.”
Some days, its “I’m picking up groceries or breakfast, so hey, swing by.”
It just happens.

I took time to analyse the conversations and interaction, I came to this conclusion,
its that non-work, genuine smile, occasional sweet message on the cup (read successful marketing tactic enhanced by personal touch, as you can see from the photo above) that I went back for day in and day out.

Its especially because its non-committal, its non-consequential. Its a Hi, Weather talk/Acquaintance talk, Bye, thing.
Just nice for someone like me.

While I run away from extensive interactions, I run to this safe zone of communication. The duration, is the selection of the order, the processing of the payment, and that extra small talk when picking up that drink.

It intrigues me how understanding self becomes a coping mechanism. (I probably will be more messed up in the relationship department if not because of them). Its not necessary because the person is in a dire state thats why this was necessary, its simply bcos I’m a social creature. I am normal. (If the situation rings a bell, you are normal too, just not one of the larger crowd of norms).

OH and one thing I noticed about myself, or the my behaviour as a consequence of the situation(-as-a-whole), eye contact became an elusive act.
Because all these interactions are short and brief, including the dealings with the students, I don’t stay to maintain eye contact long enough. I had a verbal exchange with you, we understood each other, and we move on. Thats that.

Its like, “hey, what happened, why do I disregard eye contact these days. Yes, theres always that next thing to look towards, to glance over, but where did that sincerity in speech went to?”
Not that I wasn’t sincere, but I realise, it takes effort to maintain eye contact too. To stay and gaze, Interesting.

Begs the question, how long should a random conversation be? how long to show a person that you care?

For as long as both party is comfortable, I urge.

 

 

Thanks for coming by

Be Bless
Love,
Amanda

Passion vS Manpower

It’s been said that a person without passion is as good as a walking zombie, I strongly believe in that. Passion gives a person life and makes a person unique. I am passionate about communicating with people. I am passionate about making things work.

and then theres the other side of me.

I re-visited this In My Own Words segment a couple of weeks after I first posted it up and I realize that its so un-telling. 😀 I laughed. True Story.

Anyway, In My Own Words, communication is my strength, I believe in being happy and doing what one loves to do. Appreciates a good random laugh but often too serious to realize it.

If a quote ever tells you anything, perhaps these 2 would suffice.
1) Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgement that something else is more important than fear. The brave may not live forever, but the cautious do not live at all. – Princess Diaries

2) All the world’s a stage, And all the men and women merely players – William Shakespeare.

Actually, the world’s a stage, you are the lead. There’s no retakes, there’s no NG. One show. Live it.

So text me for a good chat, hang on a little, lets see how far this acquaintance can go.

Okay,  the text above is my profile intro in most of my dating site, in-fact that 1st para is in my blog intro too.  Was reading it when I thought I should address that I’ve changed…

Yar, I’m still passionate about things.
But really back then, I’m like all in and everything about it.
These days, I think I wanna move towards being involved but in a time-in and time-out way.

A person’s value and principle doesn’t really change unless there is a defining moment.

I don’t see defining moments thus far. But whats changing would be how i’ll be dealing with things from herein. Or at least hope to..

🙂 I want to be on top of situation and not be overly involved again.
Like what happened in my previous job, (although also occurs partially because of physical burn out. )

It’s when one gets overly involve in things, too immersed in it, get carried away, be an insider too deep that one’s opinion and views get clouded (being objective somehow seems to be thrown out of the window.)

No doubt being involved is important. No doubt being about the item is important.

But I began to realise, there’s always a need to pull out, rest and not be involved for a while. Like leave it be after working hours. Leave it be during lunch hours.

Perhaps somewhat like retreat, these rest hours, or this form of un-involveness can help one to see things better. Perhaps in another point of view.

Maybe that’s y we see bosses so zen?

Anyhow, I think I can write this post better.

“I’ll be back!” *speech in Arnold style. 😀

I’m back!

Actually, the text below is not really a passion thing, it’s more like manpower allocation and really doing what one is good at.

Went by to a coffee house one day. The barista who owns the shop won plenty of awards and is really good in his art.

But being his business, he handles everything. The Purchasing, the Sales & Marketing and most of all, Brewing and Preparing that cuppa.
He commented that he works 18hours a day.

I feel that we as human cannot work too hard. Whether is it on things that we love or just to bring back the money. Because we will slowly began to hate the things we do once we begin to burnout.

Just like e Barista. How good it is then if he could focus all the energy on what he does best, preparing that cuppa.. And let someone else handles all the rest of the stuff.

I think that cuppa would then go a very very long mile for him. 🙂

Trust? Resources? Or just didn’t think and understood things that way?
I don’t know. What about you? Do you enjoy what you do? Or is ur strength being taken away, distracted by the other things thought necessary?

Letting people do what they are good in…

Thanks for coming by

Be Bless
Love,
Amanda

TOTD 9/4/12 – they feel sexy they will be sexy

What women find most attractive about men are things like competence. If you are expert at almost anything you will feel more confident and have a sense of who you are. This will show in every aspect of your body language, from the way you walk to the way you look at a woman. And women want men with soul, with passion, with vitality, with a twinkle in their eyes, with the promise of an intense, ecstatic life. When men found a mission, show courage, conviction and competence, they feel fully alive and this connects them to their potency. They feel sexy and if they feel sexy they will be sexy.
So perhaps sexual attraction can take on other less shadowy meanings for us and include playfulness, vigor, intensity, vitality and ecstatic pleasure.

Why the bias towards men, you might be thinking? Well, women are simply better at sensing and responding to non-verbal cues. If I presume to consider where women might change their body language, it is either related to their concerns over excessive male attention, usually triggered by their highly flirtatious unconscious behavior; or their worries about failing to attract men, which usually relates to a mismatch between their internal sexual interest and their external concerns to appear chaste because they believe this is more likely to lead to love.

 

– Sexual Body Language, Martin Lloyd Elliott
Thanks for coming by

Be Bless
Love,
Amanda

not everything needs a conclusion…

Met a friend from twitter for dinner recently. It was just very random, out of the blue, a Direct Message came in and asked me out for dinner.

“I was like, oh oki, sure why not, I need dinner anyway.”

😀 yes, you can try that on me too. If you want dinner and needs company drop me a msg and who knows if I’ve nothing planned beforehand we can meet. 😀

Anyway, turns out, one of the objective of the meeting was to find the strength to move on.
To know and to understand from me if the pre-conceived understanding was true.

not gonna share that part of the incident.
I want to write down what I learnt from the person.

“you are right, I agree, not entirely his fault, as you said, you changed. n perhaps this is a good defining moment for you.  this ‘incident’ is a good turning point for you. to be a better you.
guess I was too into convincing ppl. putting my opinion on people.
thinking back, I guess its not that important to have an immediate closure on something, in this case, to close-up/have a conclusion on ur feelings about him. its not important.
take your time then dear. use the situation as a motivation. be restored in the things that were taken from you. be a better you. be an even better you. I believe in you girl!”

Continue reading

Interviewed

Went for an interview at a recruitment agency. Came out leaving me in deep thoughts. In a positive way.

We conversed over the phone, I passed the phone interview. Got off the phone, evaluated the offer while on the way down to pick up the information and present myself.

Figured out the job scope was very narrow. Its contract-based (really short) and its something that I don’t see myself excelling or have a prospect in.

Arrived, chatted a little with the HR person, and shared my thoughts and came to a mutual conclusion.

Continue reading

Synthetic Happiness

Saw this video on Ted.com, titled: “Why are we happy”.
My conclusion?
We tend to be happier when we are not given too much liberty of choices, or even room to change our mind AFTER we made the choice.
As always, make your decision and march on!

1 of the comments indicated: “I suspect much of Gilbert’s conceptual framework is designed to fit his preconceptions. No hypothesis testing, little critical analysis etc. He knows what he’s looking for and by Jove he’s gonna find it. ”

Heres the video for your ingestion. He speaks real fast, so please do not watch the video if you already have a headache.

Cheers!
Amanda

Killing Us Softly (Revisited)

Was looking through my 2010 posts and decided to revisit this post.
Daphnemaia wrote an awesome post on it by the way!

A video that my tutor shared during my Social Psychology Tutorial.
Killing Us Softly 3 Advertising’s Image of Women – Jean Kilbourne’s

Very outrageous… Pretty mind-blowing to me…
Sexism, the use of Sex as a selling point.

Thanks for coming by
Be Bless
Love,
Amanda